Yesterday hurt a lot….
While I sit here you are doing what you want, what makes you happy…
I think it is my fault that I feel this way… Maybe I do need to get out, but I just don’t want to. I just don’t feel like I can….
Last night I went to dinner with my sisters ex-boyfriend… He invited me to dinner with some friends, and he has a partner, and his friends are a couple. The whole time, the only thing I could thing was you. I kept wanting to say US, I kept wanted to say WE…. I felt so humiliated, so low, so distant from you. Their entire conversation was about couples, and I wish we could have gone together. We always talked about going to have dinner with another couple… and this was our chance. I don’t understand how you can have fun with someone like Justin! His stupid conversations, and Brad and Daniel. Are you at that level??? You rather spend time with 12 year olds??
I want to go have dinner with you, go interact with more grown up people! The whole club scene thing is not fun, specially if not with you! The club gets me nothing, the young friends get me nothing as well. The only thing that gets me happiness is YOU. That feeling I had yesterday kept me going back to you, because I wished you could had been there. They kept talking about cooking, and I don’t cook, but you do! I wanted to say, well Brian this… Brian makes the best…. But I couldn’t. I am back at lost.
You couldn’t cancel real housewives with justin to spend a bit of time with me? Than you hang up on me. What is the point of going to counseling…. B/C if things don’t work I will not be your friend! I will not want to see you, and I will try to hate you.
I am sorry, but that is the truth. You are choosing stupid people with nothing! They offer you nothing! They USE YOU! YOU ARE TRADING WHORES FOR ME!
U know this.